This is fucking disgusting. We're better than this.

Here goes nothing.

Obama: opening was boilerplate. Nothing I hadn't already heard.

McCain: hearing him talk about all of what this plan needs lacks one HUGE caveat from the good senator: HE"S OPPOSED ALL THOSE THINGS FOR HIS ENTIRE 26 YEARS IN THE SENATE.

Plan? What plan?

That's right, BO, tell us how we got here ('cause some of us don't know, apparently; McCain's approval ratings are higher than Bush's...)

Oh dear FUCKING Jesus. You're talking about accountability? Are you SERIOUS?!

Okay, Mc, you get points for telling the stuffed-shirt moderator to go fly a kite. Wow. He's not very good at this.

Producers? ProDUCERS?! *palms face* Tell it to Flint, dickhead.

Spending is out of control because George W. Bush asked for huge tax cuts and started two wars at the same time. Earmarks are NOTHING compared to that. NOTHING. NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING. Earmarks are a fucking CYPHER.

Ask your boy Ted Stevens about earmarks. But yeah, that's a nice gotcha on BO. Shoulda thought of that earlier.

Barack, fuck this guy up on health care. Hard. Please.

"What are you gonna have to give up?" Oh, that hurts.

Jeez, he's got a long wish list. How ya gonna pay for all that? (It's on his website...)

"We've got to cut spending." Easy way to cut spending, John: GET THE FUCK OUT OF IRAQ.

Oh, lord, PLEASE hammer his ass about that Boeing thing.

John, as bad as you want offshore drilling, I'm gonna have to ask you to come down here to Ft. DeSoto so I can drown your ass in the pristine Gulf that you'd wantonly ruin to get some votes from people who don't know that that drilling WON'T HELP SHIT. I don't wanna live like fucking Galveston.

Families don't make those decisions now, asshat, accountants do.

Cut everyone's taxes, and the economy gets better. That's the bankrupt ideology you've been pushing for 26 years.

Oh, shit, he opened that torture can of worms. Stuff him in it and bury him, Barack.

Oh, gawd. McCain talking about Iraq. This is the part where I Elvis my TV. Shithead, did you listen to Shinseki? Did you listen to anyone else in the Pentagon who said we needed 300,000 troops to be successful?

Do you REALLY think we're gonna have an ally when we leave that country now, regardless of how internally stable it is? You're fucking deluded. Iran's influence is there whether you like it or not.

"Let us win." Unfortunately, THAT'S NOT UP TO US, DICKHEAD. There is so much bullshit in the bleearrrrghl he just let out Obama needs hip waders.

Obama OWNED McCain about talking to people we don't like. Seriously. Badly. Like, ouch.

Hey, here's an idea...

I got a letter from Henry Paulson in my email today...